Teal Swan

Saturday, 19 September 2026

Wednesday, 26 August 2026

If you step through her door (which is shaped like a shoe),
You will see that her house does what houses don't do!
There are stairs that go sideways and loops in the floor,
And a closet that opens to twenty-six more!

On the walls hang the Glimmer-Glow mirrors of truth,
That show you your childhood, your age, and your youth.
They don't show your hair, and they don't show your nose,
They show where your hiddenest happy-thought goes!

In the kitchen she brews up a Comfort-Cloud tea,
For the folks who are feeling as sad as can be.
And upstairs in the attic, tucked under the beams,
Is a giant glass bottle for collecting your dreams!

Music link:

The Teal-Tangled Tower

https://audiomack.com/martymuke/song/6a94c7882abec

Tuesday, 25 August 2026

Triggering Content

Teal Swan shares controversial memes and skits on her official social media pages under labels like "Today's funny," which often spark backlash for being insensitive or poor-taste jokes about serious issues.

Common Criticisms of Her Humor

Triggering Content: Followers and commenters have repeatedly called her out for posting dark humor or memes that trivialize deep emotional and physical trauma. [1, 2]

Contradictory Messages: Critics note that making light of pain or mental health struggles clashes directly with her image as a professional spiritual guide and self-help teacher.

Public Backlash: Many users on social media frequently leave comments under her posts explaining why the jokes are hurtful rather than healing.

Public Reception

On Reddit, users generally agree that her overall demeanor and public claims are questionable, and many view her social media humor as another example of her detachment from traditional, ethical mental health practices. [1]

Would you like to know more?

Sunday, 16 August 2026

Come to Me

Song on Audiomack

https://audiomack.com/martymuke/song/68eddd0e864d0

You Have won a prize!

Song on Audiomack. There She Is!

https://audiomack.com/martymuke/song/there-she-is.

I'm not friendly

Death Becomes Her

This is not what you think

Wednesday, 5 August 2026

I have Punished a.i. to research Teal Swan

Teal Swan continues to shock and perplex audiences with her extreme New Age ideology, supernatural claims, and highly controversial approaches to mental health.

The 12 Most Baffling Statements by Teal Swan

She is actually an Arcturian alien from a planet 36 light-years away who was engineered by a panel of extra-terrestrials.
The extra-terrestrial panel intentionally designed her to be the most beautiful human on Earth so people would listen to her.
Suicide is not inherently wrong and can be viewed as simply pushing a spiritual "reset button".
Death is fundamentally delicious.
She possesses a perfect photographic memory of her own conception and her entire time spent inside the womb.
She has x-ray vision, hyper-auditory hearing, and the physical ability to hear the movement of tectonic plates.
She can physically inject her own consciousness into a person's brainstem to medically revive them.
For 12 consecutive years during her childhood, she was kidnapped every single night to be tortured in satanic rituals without her parents noticing.
Drinking water is a method of physically infusing yourself with external information and energy frequencies.
You can channel self-love by physically projecting feelings into a glass of water and then drinking it.
Women must be energetic or physical captives of a man to unlock their true divine feminine power.
There is no spiritual authority on Earth above her, placing her on the same echelon as Jesus, the Pope, and the Dalai Lama.